10 Suggestions for Helping your YAGM Return Home

Written by Andrea Roske-Metcalfe, YAGM Country Coordinator for Mexico

1. Don’t ask the question, “So how was it?” Your YAGM cannot function in one-word answers right now, especially ones intended to sum up their entire year’s experience, and being asked to do so may cause them to start laughing or crying uncontrollably. Ask more specific questions, like “Who was your closest friend?” or “What did you do in your free time?” or “What was the food like?” or “Tell me about your typical day.”

2. If you wish to spend time with your YAGM, let them take the lead on where to go and what to do. Recognize that seemingly mundane rituals, like grocery shopping or going to the movies, may be extremely difficult for someone who has just spent a year living without a wide array of material goods. One former YAGM, for example, faced with the daunting task of choosing a tube of toothpaste from the 70-odd kinds available, simply threw up in the middle of the drugstore.

3. Expect some feelings of jealousy and resentment, especially if your YAGM lived with a host family. Relationships that form during periods of uncertainty and vulnerability (the first few months in a foreign country, for example) form quickly and deeply. The fact that your YAGM talks non-stop about their friends and family from their country of service doesn’t mean that they don’t love you, too. It simply means that they’re mourning the loss (at least in part) of the deep, meaningful, important relationships that helped them to survive and to thrive during this last year. In this regard, treat them as you would anyone else mourning a loss.

4. You may be horrified by the way your YAGM dresses; both because their clothes are old and raggedy and because they insist on wearing the same outfit three days in a row. Upon encountering their closet at home, returning YAGMs tend to experience two different emotions: (1) jubilation at the fact that they can stop rotating the same 2 pairs of jeans and 4 shirts, and (2) dismay at the amount of clothing they own, and yet clearly lived without for an entire year. Some YAGMs may deal with this by giving away entire car loads of clothing and other items to people in need. Do not “save them from themselves” by offering to drive the items to the donation center, only to hide them away in your garage. Let your YAGM do what they need to do. Once they realize, after the fact, that you do indeed need more than 2 pairs of jeans and 4 shirts to function in professional American society, offer to take them shopping. Start with the Goodwill and the Salvation Army; your YAGM may never be able to handle Macys again.

5. Asking to see photos of your YAGM’s year in service is highly recommended, providing you have an entire day off from work. Multiply the number of photos you take during a week’s vacation, multiply that by 52, and you understand the predicament. If you have an entire day, fine. If not, take a cue from number 1 above, and ask to see specific things, like photos of your YAGM’s host family, or photos from holiday celebrations. Better yet, set up a number of “photo dates,” and delve into a different section each time. Given the high percentage of people whose eyes glaze over after the first page of someone else’s photos, and the frustration that can cause for someone bursting with stories to tell, this would be an incredible gift.

6. At least half the things that come out of your YAGM’s mouth for the first few months will begin with, “In Mexico/Slovakia/South Africa/etc…” This will undoubtedly begin to annoy the crap out of you after the first few weeks. Actually saying so, however, will prove far less effective than listening and asking interested questions. Besides, you can bet that someone else will let slip exactly what you’re thinking, letting you off the hook.

7. That said, speak up when you need to! Returning YAGMs commonly assume that almost nothing has changed in your lives since they left. (This happens, in part, because you let them, figuring that their experiences are so much more exciting than yours, and therefore not sharing your own.) Be assertive enough to create the space to share what has happened in your life during the last year.

8. Recognize that living in a very simple environment with very few material belongings changes people. Don’t take it personally if your YAGM seems horrified by certain aspects of the way you live – that you shower every day, for example, or that you buy a new radio instead of duct-taping the broken one back together. Recognize that there probably are certain things you could or should change (you don’t really need to leave the water running while you brush your teeth, do you?), but also that adjusting to what may now feel incredibly extravagant will simply take awhile. Most YAGMs make permanent changes toward a simpler lifestyle. Recognize this as a good thing.

9. Perhaps you had hopes, dreams, and aspirations for your YAGM that were interrupted by their year of service. If so, you may as well throw them out the window. A large percentage of returning YAGMs make significant changes to their long-term goals and plans. Some of them have spent a year doing something they never thought they’d enjoy, only to find themselves drawn to it as a career. Others have spent a year doing exactly what they envisioned doing for the rest of their lives, only to find that they hate it. Regardless of the direction your YAGM takes when they return…rejoice! This year hasn’t changed who they are; it has simply made them better at discerning God’s call on their lives. (Note: Some YAGMs spend their year of service teaching English, some are involved in human rights advocacy, others work with the elderly or disabled, and at least one spent his year teaching British youth to shoot with bows and arrows. The results of this phenomenon, therefore, can vary widely.)

10. Go easy on yourself, and go easy on your YAGM. Understand that reverse culture shock is not an exact science, and manifests itself differently in each person. Expect good days and bad days. Don’t be afraid to ask for help (including of the pharmaceutical variety) if necessary. Pray. Laugh. Cry. This too shall pass, and in the end, you’ll both be the richer for it.

The Story Doesn't End Here

Although it’s hard to believe, I have arrived at my last ten days at the Kwaz and my final two weeks in South Africa. On July 10^th I will head to Pietermaritzburg for a few days with the rest of MUD4 before we head our separate ways and return to the States.  I find myself filled with a myriad of emotions as the end draws near: sad, happy, proud, anxious, nervous, excited...to name a few.  It feels like I’m coming to the end of a book. I can feel that the pages in my right hand are limited and I am trying to balance between wanting to know the ending and enjoying the rest of the story.  However, if this is the end of a book then it would have to be a part of a series because just as my story didn’t start when I boarded the plane to Chicago over ten months ago, my story does not end when I go to Pietermaritzburg or when I get off the plane in Lincoln.

The difficulty now will be to figure out what the point of this book was and how it fits into the series.  What has all of this meant?  What has it meant for me, my community in South Africa, my community in Nebraska, my role as a YAGM, as a church member?  I don’t know if I will ever be able to come up with an answer that anyone else will fully understand but I will try to head in that direction. 

David McCullough, Jr. recently told a group of graduates, “Climb the mountain not to plant your flag, but to embrace the challenge, enjoy the air and behold the view. Climb the mountain so you can see the world, not so the world can see you.  And then you too will discover the great and curious truth of the human experience is that selflessness is the best thing you can do for yourself. The sweetest joys of life, then, come only with the recognition that you're not special. Because everyone is.”  I think that this is a great start to talking about my year.  I didn’t come to South Africa to say that I’ve been to South Africa or to say that I’ve lived in another country for a year. I came to experience.  I came to accompany the people, to experience a new culture and customs, to learn about the struggles that others face, to grow in as many ways as I could and to be challenged by all of it.  And to be honest, my time here was more challenging than I ever thought it would be but, at the same time, I know that the struggles I faced helped me to grow and to learn lessons I never could have been taught in a classroom or read from a book. 

--I experienced and saw the challenges that South Africa is facing; 
I learned awareness.

--I attempted to speak isiZulu which gave many opportunities for laughter; 
I learned humility. 

--I lived in a culture that lets time happen instead of being controlled by time; 
I learned patience.

--I sang at vigils for families who had recently lost love ones;
I learned empathy.

--I watched those same families dancing at a funeral a few days later; 
I learned hope.

--I celebrated during weddings, youth gatherings, and holidays; 
I learned joy. 

--I met people living in poverty but full of life; 
I learned faith.

--I lived simply which allowed me to better understand the lives of those around me;
I learned gratitude.    

--I had days where nothing seemed to go right but would wake up to the sun rising the next morning; 
I learned grace.  

--I became part of a family and community in rural KZN; 
I learned Ubuntu.

The reality is that this experience was never about just me.  I do not live in a world that is isolated from everyone else.  If you haven’t read any of my previous posts Ubuntu is a Zulu/Xhosa word that basically says that a person is a person through other people. We are all connected to each other as humans and, because of this, we are called into a greater community.  There are so many people that have made this experience possible and made it what is has been.  For that, I am forever grateful.  I was blessed with an amazing opportunity and I hope that I was able to be a blessing to those that I accompanied throughout my time here. 

I am especially thankful for Reverend Xaba and his willingness to help me get involved, everyone at the Kwaz for their daily smiles and greetings, Goodness who became my South African mom, the people of Ephangweni Parish and Ondini Circuit who welcomed me into their churches and communities, friends from Estcourt who gave me relief from the day to day grind, and everyone else that I met in South Africa this year.  Whenever anyone asks what I will miss about this place I think of the people because they are what make this place so special.  I am also thankful for my MUD4 family for all the great memories we shared this year and for always being willing to listen and discuss anything and everything.

I am also thankful for everyone in the States who has supported and continues to support me.  As Frederick Buechner says, “You can kiss your family and friends goodbye and put miles between you, but at the same time you carry them with you in your heart, your mind, your stomach, because you do not just live in a world but a world lives in you.” So a huge thank you goes out to the Sheridan community whose financial and prayer support allowed this year to happen, my parents and family who have always supported me wholeheartedly, my friends who were willing to listen to my frustrations throughout the year, and everyone else who supported me with prayers, or reading my blog or sending letters, emails, cards and packages!  You have a part in this book too and I can’t wait to share it with you--I’ll see you all soon!

I think it will take a while for me to truly understand everything that this year has meant and I might not ever be able to grasp its full impact but, as this book comes to an end, I am also eager to see what the plot of the next book will be.  Above all, though, I pray that I am able to continue to experience new things, to learn, to grow, to hope, to be grateful, to need less, to give more, to love much, to laugh often and to have a good time doing it!

“And so my prayer is that your story will have involved some leaving and some coming home, some summer and some winter, some roses blooming out like children in a play. My hope is your story will be about changing, about getting something beautiful born inside of you, about learning to love a woman or a man, about moving yourself around water, around mountains, around friends, about learning to love others more than we love ourselves, about learning oneness as a way of understanding God. We get one story, you and I, and one story alone. God has established the elements, the setting and the climax and the resolution. It would be a crime not to venture out, wouldn’t it?”

Donald Miller, Through Painted Deserts

Lessons from My Grandparents

It’s been three years now since my mom’s parents died in a car accident.  I’ll never forget hearing the news that day and the tough week and months that followed. I still think about them all the time and miss them terribly.  They left too soon but I know that part of them is still here and lives in me, my family and everyone who had the pleasure of knowing them.  The farm that they lived on, although now non-existent, was my favorite place to go when I was younger and I still think about it with great nostalgia.  I spent many summer weeks with them when I was growing up and I was able to learn many life lessons from them.

Work Hard

My grandpa was born on the farm that he lived and worked on his entire life.  By the time I was around they had pretty much retired from farming but they continued to grow a huge garden every summer.  When they finally moved into town they continued to work as the managers of their apartment complex. They showed me that nothing good ever gets done without a little elbow grease! (And fresh vegetables just taste better!)

Write Letters

My grandma would write letters to anyone and everyone, sometimes by hand and sometimes with her typewriter.  With computers and cell phones it is so easy to send a text message or email to someone and not think twice about it but I’ve learned that taking the extra time to pick out a card or hand-write a note means so much more.  It not only makes you appreciate your family and friends more but it shows them how important they are to you.

Enjoy the Simple Things

My favorite thing to do with my grandparents was playing cards.  When I would stay there at times in the summer they would invite over their friends and we would have card nights with fresh popcorn and root beer floats.  They taught me to have fun with cards and board games and just being in the company of friends. We didn’t need a television or gaming system to keep us entertained.  My family still continues to play cards and board games and family gatherings and still have a lot of fun doing it!

Learn to cook

Although my grandma rarely used recipes they aren’t hard to follow.  And making food for people creates a special bond with them as you have taken the time and energy to prepare something.  My grandma always made great food and I loved the way the smells would fill the house. As I’ve gotten older I’ve really enjoyed being able to cook and bake. Although I don’t do anything to fancy here in South Africa I am glad that I learned the basics to be able to fend for myself!

Be Generous With Your Time and Love

People said that my grandparents never knew a stranger.  I remember when I was younger and we would go into town and it seemed like every place we went to someone, or several people, would stop and talk to them and see how they were doing. I know that they came from a small community but it was still neat to see how much they cared about others and how much other people cared about them.  It was very clear how much their friendships meant to people when hundreds of people had to sit on chairs outside of the church at the funeral.  They taught me how important it is to put the people you care about first and that it will come back to repay you in more ways than you can imagine.

Losing people we love is never easy but they are never truly gone.  There is a video series by Pastor Rob Bell called Nooma and one of the videos is about death.  I came across it about six months after my grandparents died and it changed my whole perspective.  If you have 15 minutes you should watch it because it is a great video. Click Here to Watch It is easy to forget that God is still there when we are going through difficult times but that is when we should lean on Him the most. He is there for us even though it might not always seem like it.

"Though You have made me see troubles, many and bitter, You will restore my life again." --Psalm 71: 20

The Final Countdown

I don’t know if I have ever paid attention to time as much as I have since being in South Africa. Maybe it is because no one else cares about time so I’m trying to keep track of it for an entire nation or maybe it is just being away from what I was used to in the States. Either way, I have watched clocks and calendars a lot this past year.  I counted the days until the first retreat in November, I counted down until Christmas, until my trip to Cape Town, until the second retreat, until my parents came--I seemed to be counting down days all the time which is something that I had never real done before.

It started out when I spent the majority of my first month sitting in the office at the Kwaz.  There is only so much that I was able to do at that point so I spent a lot of time reading while waiting for the phone to ring.  Time seemed to move so slowly on those days.  I am sure part of it was my expectations of what I would be doing at my site and part of it was just learning the slow pace of life compared to the United States.  I am still challenged by the pace of life and the phrase “just now.” Coming from a culture were now actually means right away it is hard to adjust to nothing starting on time.

If the feelings about time have taught me anything it is patience.  I have come to realize that it doesn’t help if I worry about church not starting on time or if I’m waiting for hours for someone to pick me up. Things will happen when they happen and I just have to go with it.  It doesn’t do me any good to get frustrated so I might as well relax and enjoy the day.

The final countdown I have is the one until I will be back in the US and it is at exactly two months from today. I have often thought about what that first day back will be like and am both excited and scared.  I am so excited to see my family and friends again but, at the same time, it will mean the end of my time in South Africa.  It means leaving people who have become my family and leaving a place that has taught me more than I ever could have learned in a textbook.

During the first few months, when there were still over 300 days left, I honestly didn’t know if I would make it this far.  But now, with only two months separating me from Lincoln, I am embracing every day that I have left in South Africa.  I have been given an incredible opportunity here and will continue to have amazing experiences for the last 50+ days at my site.  I know that July 10^th will come and I will have to say goodbye to the Kwaz but for now I am looking at each moment as a blessing.  I’m using every day as a chance to love these people, this place and the life that I am living.  Each activity, day of work, and conversation continues to become more and more precious.  I challenge you to do the same—Embrace the moment, love the people around you, and look at each day, person, and conversation as a gift. Because that’s what they are.

"Nothing lasts forever so live it up, drink it down, laugh it off, avoid the bull, take chances and never have regrets. Because at one point everything you did was exactly what you wanted."

Not All Taxi Rides are Created Equal

The majority of my transportation, especially long distance, is done in a minibus taxi.  These ‘taxis’ are pretty much vans with four rows of seats and filled with 15 passengers.  They go everywhere around the country and even to other places in Africa.  Below is a picture of a taxi rank, although most of them are much busier than and not as clean as this one. 

There are two things that I really struggle with when riding the taxis.  The first is that the taxi doesn’t depart until it is full so you never know when you will leave.  The other problem I have is that they are always so hot! For some reason no one likes having windows open no matter how hot it gets so I often arrive at my destination feeling sweaty and gross.  Somehow I often get stuck in the back row which is the only row that they cram four people into.  Oftentimes the last person to get in that row has to wedge themselves into a four-inch space.  Not much fun.

Last week, when I was going to Pietermaritzburg, my tolerance for the taxis was maxing out.  Going from Estcourt to PMB only takes about an hour but waiting for over an hour for it the taxi to fill is more the rule than the exception.  This time, after 90 minutes of waiting, the taxi was full but for some reason the rank manager decided we should go in a different taxi so all 15 of us had to get out and move to another taxi.  I had been in the back by a window which was great because then I could control how hot it was by me.  However, upon moving to the other taxi I ended up being the last one to have to squeeze into the back row, of course. After squeezing into a spot barely large enough for a small child we were on our way but with no control of the windows it naturally got very warm. I got to PMB and told Elise, another volunteer, that I don’t know how many more of those I’m going to be able to handle!  Then, right on cue, my return trip to Estcourt was very different.

Because there are so many taxis in one rank it can become confusing and difficult to find the one that is going where you need.  On my way back to Estcourt we had just gotten on the interstate when an older woman a few rows ahead of me started asking about where the taxi was going.  Granted, I couldn’t understand most of the conversation as it was in Zulu but I did hear her saying, “Tugela” several times which is another hour past Estcourt.  She was realizing, too late, that she had gotten on the wrong taxi.

She soon began to cry as she did not have enough money to then make the trip from Estcourt to Tugela.  Without pause, a girl sitting next to her began asking everyone to put some money together for her.  Through everyone’s donations the woman was given R75, more than enough to make the next leg of her journey.

I watched the whole thing in awe and humility.  God knew that this was just the thing I needed to renew my spirit as frustration and annoyance had begun to take over.  “Umuntu ngumuntu ngabantu” is a Zulu expression meaning, “A person is a person through people.” In other words, we do not get where we are solely by ourselves.  There are so many people around us that make us who we are and help us along the way. The spirit of Ubuntu filled that taxi as a group of strangers were willing to help another stranger for no benefit of their own.  Such a small but awesome experience to be a part of and one I will not soon forget!

“Africans believe in something that is difficult to render in English.  We call it ubuntu or botho.  It means the essence of being human.  It speaks about humaneness, gentleness, hospitality, putting yourself out on behalf of others, being vulnerable.  It embraces compassion and toughness.  It recognizes that my humanity is bound up with yours, for we can only be human together."

-- Archbishop Desmond Tutu

The Glory of Easter

He is risen! He is risen, indeed!  Well we have finally gotten through the trials and suffering of the past week and have gotten to the glorious Easter Sunday!  When we see the empty tomb we are, once again, reminded of the new life that we receive in Christ and the promise for eternal life. One of my favorite things to do here is to sit on my porch and watch the sun rise. I love watching the colors and feeling the warmth as it rolls up over the horizon. It was especially beautiful this morning and was a perfect symbol that shows that no matter how dark and cold things get, the morning will come and the sun/Son will rise again! Amen.

The following lyrics are from one of my favorite songs about Easter, called “Now Let Us Dance!”

Now let us dance for the victory is won!

Now let us sing for song has begun,

Now let us live in the light of the Son

Gathered and called and united as one.

When we see the grave, stone is rolled away

Hear the angels say, “He is Risen!”

When we rise from death, filled with God’s own breath

Dead in sin and yet we’re forgiven!

At dawn as they walked, hanging their heads,

They fell in reverence when angels said,

“Why do you look for the living with the dead?”

Their mourning walk turned to dancing instead!

It's Friday but Sunday is Coming!

Anne Lamott once said, “I do not, at all, understand the mystery of grace. Only that it meets us where we are but does not leave us where it found us.”  As I think about Jesus’ path to the cross and his crucifixion I don’t think anyone will ever be able to understand the grace of God. I cannot fathom that one man would take all of my problems, all of my faults, place them on his shoulders, and die for me so that I could be freed from their weight.  And to think, he did it not only for me but for you and for all of humanity.

The price of sin is death and we should have been the ones to die on that cross but Jesus took our place.  Because of his suffering, we now have an advocate when we suffer.  It does not matter what we are going through or how difficult of a situation we may be facing because we know that Jesus understands.  He, too, has suffered and he has felt pain worse than we could ever imagine.  He was beaten, mocked, tormented and tortured throughout his final agonizing hours.  I actually think God darkened the Earth because He could no longer bear watching the way that humanity was treating his son. 

But you know what Jesus was thinking about when he was suffering? How much he loves you and me.  The first thing Jesus says when he is hanging on the cross is to ask God to forgive those who were crucifying him. I think that he was not only asking for the forgiveness of the men that day but for us too because if it wasn’t for our sins he would not be dying like this.  There is no depth of despair to which we could fall that is worse than what Jesus bore for us on the cross.  But he did it because he loves us and no matter what we are going through he is there for us.  He understands.  “Surely he took up our pain and bore our suffering, yet we considered him punished by God, stricken by him, and afflicted.  But he was pierced for our transgressions, he was crushed for our iniquities; the punishment that brought us peace was upon him, and by his wounds we are healed.”  Isaiah 53: 4-5

But the story doesn’t end here.  The story of Jesus didn’t end when he died on the cross.  It continued through the lives of his disciples then and continues with us now.  Although darkness was cast over the Earth when Jesus died we now carry the light of God with us.  As we follow Jesus to the cross today I pray that we are moved by the sadness of Christ’s death, humbled by his eternal love for and filled with the joy of knowing that we are set free from our sins.  And let us also be strengthened by the thought that we are now able to spread the love and grace that is found in Jesus’ death and resurrection.  It’s Friday but Sunday is coming!

This is how Love wins, every single time 

Climbing high upon a tree where someone else should die 

This is how Love heals, the deepest part of you 

Letting Himself bleed into the middle of your wounds 

This is what Love says, standing at the door 

You don’t have to be who you’ve been before 

Silenced by His voice, death can’t speak again 

This is how Love wins

Steven Curtis Chapman, “How Love Wins”

Called to Live a Life of Love

There’s that age-old question about whether or not you would want to know the day you are going to die.  How would you live your life differently?  What would you do with your final years, months, weeks or days?  I’ve been thinking about this question a lot this week as I look at how Jesus prepared for his death.  He knew that his death was coming but he didn’t go skydiving or spend a week on the beach in Hawaii.  Instead of doing things for himself, he spent his time with those he cared about and teaching them how to serve.

We get the Maundy in Maundy Thursday from the Latin word for commandment.  On what would be his last night, there are three commands that Jesus gives to his disciples.  The first command was to wash one another’s feet.  Jesus decides to show his love for his disciples by lowering himself from the role of teacher and washing their feet, a job usually only done by servants. (I don’t know about you but washing feet, especially of people who have been walking on dirt roads in sandals, is not at the top of my Bucket List.) Although I don’t think we need to literally wash other people’s feet, Jesus does call us to do more for those around us.  In this one act the son of God is showing that no one is greater than anyone else. At the end of the day, we are all human and we all struggle so we should be willing to help each other out when we can, no matter of status.

The second command Jesus gives is during the Passover meal.  Jesus tells his disciples to eat the bread and drink the cup of wine in order to remember him and the sacrifice that he would be making.  On the night of the first Passover the people of Israel were delivered from the bondage of slavery in Egypt and on the night of this Passover meal Jesus would deliver the people of God from the bondage of sin.  Jesus is the spotless lamb who is willing to die so that we would be saved from death and given eternal life.

“A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. This is how all men will know that you are my disciples, when they see the love you have for each other.”  Jesus’ final command to the disciples seems so simple but I think that most people struggle to follow it, or at least I do.  It is really hard to love everyone that we come across.  There are bound to be people who get on our nerves and frustrate us.  And surely Jesus isn’t asking us to love the people who have hurt us, right?  I think that he is. But he doesn’t mean the Valentine’s Day, hugs and kisses kind of love all the time.  I think he is calling us to be the bigger person when it isn’t always easy, turn the other cheek when we’ve been hit, and genuinely try to get along with one another.  Everyone is a child of God and should be cherished for that.  We shouldn’t be showing our love when it is convenient or when we agree with everything someone believes in.  We are called to love in spite of our differences.

This is an interesting command for me to think about with my time here in South Africa and my experiences in the States.  I know that there is still a lot of racism in the US but here it is much more obvious.  Less than 20 years removed from the apartheid system there is still a lot of tension between people here and I see discrimination and hear racist comments all the time.  In my time here, however, I have tried to break down some of those boundaries and ‘spread the love’ through little actions like asking why a racist remark was said or what that means to them.  I think that the little actions we do matter just as much, if not more than the big things. It’s not what you say that defines you, it’s what you do.

We might not know when our last day on Earth will be but Jesus laid out pretty plainly what we are supposed to do with the time that we do have: wash each other’s feet, feed one another, and love each other. In essence, he is calling us to be servants.  I pray that in our service to each other we will find the joy and presence of God that He wants us to discover.  In Jesus’ death and resurrection he lifted the burden of sin from us so that we could be free to share his love.  So, what’s stopping us? 

"And I will live to carry Your compassion, to love a world that’s broken, to be Your hands and feet.  And I will give with this life that I’ve been given and go beyond religion to see the world be changed. By the power of Your name."

Lincoln Brewster, Power of Your Name

The Struggles of the Disciples

Have you ever thought about what it would have been like to be one of Jesus’ twelve disciples during this week of their lives?  We get a glimpse of some of their stories through the Gospel accounts but I can’t imagine how scared and confused they must have been as the events of the week transpired.   As we follow their story, this week we realize that 2000 years later we are not that different, and we struggle with the same things they did.

When Jesus washes the disciples’ feet Simon Peter protests and says that their master should not be washing their feet.  Simon Peter felt that he was above the charity of Jesus.  He didn’t understand that Jesus was showing his grace and teaching them to show that same love and compassion to others.  How many times have we had problems but failed to bring them to God?  We are often too full of pride to admit our own struggles and ask for help, aren’t we? Donald Miller has a quote that I love that says, “In exchange for our humility and willingness to accept the charity of God, we are given a kingdom.  And a beggar’s kingdom is better than a proud man’s delusion.”  Just as the disciples learned to humble themselves we are called to humble ourselves, both to God but also to each other, in our actions and relationships.  We need to let down our pride and be open to the grace that is given to us.

When Jesus is arrested in the garden it is written that the disciples scattered and fled so that they would not be captured.  How often do we also turn from God when bad things happen?  It’s easy to put the blame on someone we can’t see right? Instead of turning away from Him in difficult times we should draw nearer to Him.  In Ecclesiastes it is written, “On a good day, enjoy yourself; on a bad day, consider: God arranges for both kinds of days so that we won’t take anything for granted.”  It’s not always easy because it seems like it would be so simple for God to turn things around and make our problems better but He knows what He is doing. We just have to trust that it will all turn out right in the end.

We see the struggles of Peter once again when he denies being a disciple on three different occasions after Jesus is arrested.  It would be easy to find fault in Peter but I realize that I am not so innocent either.  Maybe I have never outright denied being Christian but there are times when I have skirted around the truth or done things that did not show that I was a follower of God.  I think that any time we fail to show Jesus’ love, whether it is talking about someone negatively, not helping someone in need, or any other various ways that we fall short of the disciple we are called to be, we are denying knowing Him.  Because we are loved by God we are, in turn, called to love others.  Jesus even commands the disciples to love one another and that is how people will know they follow Him.  We are still called to that same command.

Through the stories of the disciples we can see that they had similar difficulties to the things we now face today.  I pray that as we reflect upon our own shortcomings, those times when we have failed to show God’s love in the world, that we will be filled with the reassurance that we are not the only ones who struggle. God knows that following Him is not easy but He is there for you, and for me, when we fall.  We just need to be willing to accept the outstretched hand that is helping us back up.

“You see, at just the right time, when we were still powerless, Christ died for the ungodly. Very rarely will anyone die for a righteous person, though for a good person someone might possibly dare to die. But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.”

Romans 5: 6-8

The Joy and Pain of Palm Sunday

It is hard for me to believe that today marks the beginning of Holy Week. It seems like we were just celebrating Christmas. I have always enjoyed Holy Week: a time of both joy and sorrow as we follow Jesus from his joyous entrance into Jerusalem to his death on the cross and, finally, his glorious resurrection on the cross.


Today was a very interesting Palm Sunday service for me. At my church in the States the service is usually filled with joyful songs and a parade of children waving palm branches as we celebrate Jesus' entry into the city like the people in Jerusalem 2000 years ago. "They took palm branches and went out to meet him, shouting, "Hosanna! Blessed is he who comes in the name of the Lord! Blessed is the king of Israel!" John 12:13


Today at my church in South Africa, however, there was also funeral during the service so instead of an exciting day of celebration the only procession was that of the casket and the family of the deceased. As you can imagine, this was very different from what I was used to. On my way to church I was eager to read the story and hear the songs of praise and although there were some choruses that were sung and the scripture reading was the story of Palm Sunday the day was marked by the sadness of death. It was a Palm Sunday service I had never experienced before but I think that it is a perfect representation of how the day was for Jesus. Although there were joyful songs and much celebration, He knew that his death on the cross lay ahead in only a few days.


It may seem strange that these people who celebrated and praised their savior could turn against him so quickly but they had expectations of what God was going to do. They wanted to be saved in a way that Jesus was not living up to so they got angry. We aren't that much different though, are we? How often do we go from praising God when something goes well to cursing him when something bad happens. How fickle our hearts truly are. Lucky for us, Jesus' love for us doesn't change. As He loved the people who hated Him 200 years ago, He loves us now.


I pray that we may use this day and the days ahead to reflect on the love that Jesus has for all of us. He knew that the songs of praise would turn to shouts of anger but he loved them anyway. I pray that we may have this same compassion in our hearts. As Jesus enters Jerusalem today may he also enter our hearts and our minds so that we can share the love that He has given us.

"I am the thorn in Your crown, but You love me anyway. I am the sweat from Your brow, but You love me anyway. I am the nail in Your wrist, but You love me anyway. I am Judas' kiss, but You love me anyway. See now I am the man who yelled out from the crowd for Your blood to be spilled on this earth-shaking ground. Yes then I turned away with a smile on my face with this sin in my heart, tried to bury Your grace... But You love me anyway. It's like nothing in life that I've ever known, but You love me anyway." 

You Love Me Anyway, Sidewalk Prophets

A Whirlwind Trip (My Parents Visit RSA)

After several months of preparation and many of emails and phone calls back and forth deciding on plans my parents finally made the trip to South Africa to visit me, my site, and this beautiful country.

The week before they arrived I had a retreat with the rest of the volunteers so instead of going all the way back to my site I stayed in Pietermaritzburg on Monday night and headed to Durban the next day to wait for them at the airport. Although their flight was not due to arrive until 8:10PM I got to the airport around 11:30AM. Mostly because I had my big backpack and did not want to be carrying it around Durban all day.  Around 7PM I got a call on my cell phone and heard my dad on the other end saying they had missed their connection in Johannesburg! =( But they were able to get on the next flight and would be arriving at 9:55. =) And they did!  After many hugs and excited greetings at the airport we headed to our taxi that would take us to our hotel and after more than 24 hours of travelling I think my parents were definitely ready for some sleep!

The next day we got up and had breakfast before heading out to explore the Umhlanga area.  Umhlanga is a northern suburb of Durban and is a pretty nice area.  There is a lot of coastline with nice beaches and also the biggest mall in the southern hemisphere.  We walked along the beach for a while and also enjoyed a movie at the mall the first day. I know, not the most “African” experience to start their time here but it was great just being together!

My Mom and I at the Umhlanga Pier

On Thursday we started our day with a visit to the Natal Sharks Board, an organization that takes care of the shark nets along the KZN beaches.  They also have a video presentation and live shark dissection which are both very informative and fun to watch, although I think we smelled like fish for the rest of the day! 

Tiger Shark ready for Dissection

After the Sharks Board we headed north toward Pietermaritzburg.  Our plan was to visit a Lion Park on the way but, upon arrival, we were told that our rental car sat too low to the ground and we would not be able go.  We were very disappointed but there was an African Birds of Prey Sanctuary nearby that we were able to go to instead.  It had all types of eagles, hawks, owls, etc. that were injured or sick and were either being rehabilitated for the wild or would be taken care of at the sanctuary.

After this we headed to Howick, a small town north of PMB, which has a waterfall as well as several craft shops and a small market.  After that we headed back towards PMB and met my country coordinator, Brian Konkol, for dinner.  We also stayed the night at their place and my parents were able to meet the whole Konkol family including Brian’s wife Kristen and their son Khaya.

The Konkol Family! (They are a Wisconsin family but notice Khaya's Nebraska shirt my parents brought him! Go Big Red!)

On Friday it was finally time to head a little farther north and visit my site.  Upon arrival at KwaZamokuhle we unloaded our luggage before taking a tour of the Centre and introducing my parents to the people I spend most of my time with.  We heard a lot of “Siyabonga!” (We are thankful!) and “Siyajabula!” (We are happy!) It was a great experience to have my parents see my site and to be able understand more about my experiences here.  It was also very reaffirming to have people like Constance, my site supervisor, tell me that they have missed me while I have been gone.

Goodness told my mom, "This is my boy!" 

After the tour we took the 20km trip into Estcourt to get some groceries for the weekend.  I also took my parents to Nando’s which is a staple South African restaurant.  We originally were not going to be able to see some of my friends from town, Eddie and Verna, because they were going to be out of town for the weekend but we visited Eddie at his store and then we ran into Verna at the grocery store. A strange set of coincidences but a great opportunity for my parents!

On Saturday we headed to Royal Natal National Park to do some hiking in the Drakensberg Mountains.  The hike took a little less than four hours but we all made it and had a great time.  The weather was perfect and the views were amazing!  Afterwards we treated ourselves to some food at Tower of Pizza before spending the rest of the afternoon relaxing at my site.

Royal Natal National Park

On Sunday we got ready and went to church.  Normally my church service is around 1.5 hours long but for some reason the one day we needed to leave early it was going to go really long. After two hours of service and 40 minutes of a sermon (that wasn’t over) we had to leave to make the five hour drive to Hluhluwe-Imfolozi. We made pretty good time heading to the park and only made a quick stop in PMB to pick up a fellow volunteer, Elise Anderson, who would be going with us on safari.

We were worried about time because the gates of the park close at 6PM and the place we were staying at was inside the park so we needed to make sure we got there on time, which we did.  On our drive from the gate to the campgrounds we saw several animals but nothing compared to what we would see the next day.

We had to get up nice and early (4:30) to make the hour long drive to the gate of the park and meet our safari guide at 6.  Although it was foggy and semi-dark on the way down we did see a few animals including a water buffalo on the side of the road.  Eventually we made it to the gate, parked the car, and got into our safari truck.  It was cold for the first few hours of the drive but luckily they had blankets for us.  We also stopped for breakfast and coffee in the morning and then had a delicious lunch with grilled meats and nice salads.  Oh and the animal spotting was great too!

Ready for Safari!

Except for a small stretch before lunch when we were looking for rhinos we were always seeing different animals.  Zebra, giraffe, rhino, water buffalo, a pair of lions, elephants, dung beetles, crocodile, and several more.  There are two things that really stick out for me though.  The first was when we came across a big herd of buffalo that were quietly grazing.  Our guide told us that when they feel threatened the males and adults will move to the outside of the group and form a circle around the younger ones.  Within a few minutes a lion comes onto the scene and we see the buffalo do exactly what he said they would do.  The lions did not seem like they were very interested in the buffalo at the time but it was still really neat to see how quickly they moved to protect their young at the sign of danger.

The coolest part of being at the park was the elephants though.  On our way back at the end of the guided safari our guide got a call that some elephants had been spotted near the road about ten minutes away so we headed that direction quickly.  We soon saw several elephants near the road and a mother and young calf(we were told it was less than ten days old) ran right behind our safari truck!  After getting dropped off at the gate we got in our car and decided to look for more of the elephants.  For the next hour we followed a herd of over 50 elephants with several very small babies.  It was such an amazing sight to see!  On our way back to our campground we came across a male elephant in the road who did not want to move for us. Since we were in a small Honda Civic we did not really want to play chicken with it either.  However, he started walking towards us and we had to back up for several hundred yards before it finally decided to leave the road and let us pass.  It was kind of a scary experience but also one I will never forget!

Male Lion hiding in the grass

Mom and her week-old baby crossing the road!

Playing chicken with an elephant! We lost.

The next day we drove around the park for a while in the morning before it was time to head back to Durban.  We had a relaxing afternoon and a nice dinner as it was my parents’ last night in South Africa.  The next day it was time to say goodbye which was tough to do but I know I will see them again in only four months.  It was so great to have them here! Not only for the great, ‘touristy’ things that we got to do and see but also for them to be able to see my site and the way that I live here.  There is only so much that words and pictures can show, but, now that they have been here, they should have a better understanding of my life in South Africa.

I am so grateful for everything they have done, do, and will continue to do for me! And a huge THANK YOU to everyone who prayed for them while they were travelling and visiting me here! It was a great experience and one I will never forget!

Make the Most of What God Gives

During the sermons in church, because I am not able to understand the majority of what is said, I will read my Bible.  I recently rediscovered the book of Ecclesiastes and wanted to share some verses with you. They are verses 18-20 in chapter 5 and are taken from The Message.

“After looking at the way things are on this earth, here’s what I’ve decided is the best way to live: Take care of yourself, have a good time, and make the most of whatever job you have for as long as God gives you life. And that’s about it. That’s the human lot. Yes, we should make the most of what God gives, both the bounty and the capacity to enjoy it, accepting what’s given and delighting in the work. It’s God’s gift! God deals out joy in the present, the now!”

It’s so simple, isn’t it? We really have no control over this life so why worry about it? Once we realize that everything is all His anyways everything will become so much more enjoyable. Finding this has given me a renewed sense of wonder and has relieved much of the stress that I have been feeling about the  future. There is a part in Donald Miller’s book, Through Painted Deserts, where he is talking with his friend about God’s plan for us and his friend says “‘It is whatever God wants it to be. Maybe we are just supposed to trust that He won’t beat us up when we get there. Maybe we are supposed to trust that He is good.’” Amen.

A Busy Festive Season

Here in South Africa what we would call the Holiday Season is called the Festive Season and mine was very busy!  I apologize for not posting recently but I’m going to give you an update on the past month and when you hear all that I’ve been up to I think you will understand. To make up for it, I was actually able to put some pictures in this post! Woot!

In mid-December I travelled with Reverend Xaba to Ladysmith (about an hour away) for the Southeastern Diocese(SED) Youth Conference.  I didn’t have any idea what was going to be happening, what I should be, or where I would be staying.  The only thing I knew was that it would be from Wednesday afternoon to Sunday and some other MUD volunteers would be there.  When we arrived I was greeted by Jaime and Katie who live near Johannesburg. (They aren’t actually in the SED but Jaime’s host is the General Secretary of ELCSA and wanted them to come so they did!) Eventually Isaac and Elise came from Durban and Pietermaritzburg, respectively, so it was a nice chance to see some other volunteers.

As for the conference, it was several days of speakers who all talked in isiZulu for the most part.  Needless to say, we didn’t understand much of it but we did have some helpful youth that would translate important parts for us.  Everyone seemed to appreciate us being there though and was very hospitable. We took part in a really fun march through the town in support of a campaign against the abuse of women and children which involved a lot of singing and some running!  We also took part in the choir competition although there were only four of us compared to the parishes with at least 15 people.  I don’t think we won but we got a lot of cheers!

On Saturday we went with the host family that we were staying with to a traditional Zulu wedding in a nearby township.  When we first got there they were slaughtering the cow which was a gift for the bride’s family.  It wasn’t the most pleasant sight to behold but interesting to see. The wedding involved a lot of singing and dancing in both contemporary wedding clothes and traditional Zulu wedding attire which was really cool to see.  There was a great sense of community with everyone there and it was an experience I’ll never forget!

Bride and Groom and Wedding Party

The Kwaz Centre’s last day was December 21^st and they had a nice lunch celebration to end the great year and thank everyone for their hard work.  At the end of that week I went to Pietermaritzburg to hang out with Elise and Steve for a couple of days before going back to Ephangweni for Christmas.  The church Christmas celebration was nice with a reenactment of the Christmas story by the Sunday School children that was very cute!  It was very weird sweating during Christmas church service and was definitely an, “I’m in Africa” moment.

The biggest event of the past month was my trip to the Mother City, Cape Town, with all eleven other volunteers.  We all decided to meet there to celebrate the New Year together and it was a great time.  We visited Robben Island, the penguins at Boulder Beach, Cape Point and Cape of Good Hope, Long Street, the V&A Waterfront, and several of us climbed Table Mountain.  I even tried my hand out at surfing when we were at the beach in Muizenberg and had a great time! I was able to get up on the board my first time and by the second try I was riding the waves, albeit not that big, all the way into shore!

Climb up Table Mountain! It was intense but so fun!

View of Table Mountain from Robben Island

Hang Ten! =P

Earlier this week I had received several cards in the mail for my birthday and Constance, my host, said “Why do you have so many letters this week?” so I told her that it would be my birthday on Friday and she nodded but nothing more was said.  Well Friday came and I talked to Constance during the morning but nothing was said about it being my birthday or anything so I just figured she had forgotten and that was alright; I didn’t need a celebration or anything.  However, tea time comes and Constance tells me to come with her which I know is strange because she usually has tea in her office.

She leads me into the dining room and all the staff is in there and they start singing “Happy Birthday” to me in both Zulu and English and all I can do is smile.  The tables are filled with snacks and drinks and there is even a cake for me.  I was so grateful for this kind act and Constance said they wanted to celebrate another year of life with me.  When they finished singing they started clapping which usually happens when there is going to be some Zulu stomping so I got excited. One of the women acted like she was going to do it but then backed up so I went into the middle and did a few stomps and they loved it! It was a great experience and I was truly humbled by their generosity for my birthday.

Overall, the past month has been full of a lot of great experiences that I know I won’t soon forget!  I hope that these last six months will be full of many more “I’m in Africa” moments and experiences that remind me what I’m doing here.  I hope that you all are having a blessed start to 2012 and continue to have a great year! 

Young Adults in Global Mission: Life without Consumerism by Heidi Torgerson-Martinez

This article was written by the program director for the Young Adults in Global Mission program, Heidi Torgerson-Martinez, and talks about the challenges faced by program participants in contrast to American consumerism. 

1] "Is that really what it's like in the United States, Heidi?" asked an elderly friend as we sat around the kitchen table one afternoon. "Isn't it true that everybody has their own bedroom and their own house? That everybody has cars and big televisions and internet in their houses? I'd never go myself; I'm too old and too scared for that. But I understand why people do it. Everybody wants those things. Everybody wants a nice, comfortable life like you all have in your country. Who wants to spend every day worrying about whether you can feed your kids when you can go to the United States and just buy anything you want?"

[2] So went one of many similar conversations I had with friends and colleagues when I served as a long-term missionary in Mexico. These conversations often began as a reflection on a neighbor's decision to try and cross the border into the United States as a means of supporting one's family — a last-resort decision for most, and one that was never reached lightly. The frequency with which those conversations turned to my friends' assumptions about the U.S. American consumer lifestyle, however, became for me a convicting commentary on my home culture.

[3] Many a social scientist has compared consumer culture in the United States to religion. Indeed, consumerism has shaped a series of norms and rituals that look a lot like religious practice. Receipt of one's first credit card is as important a rite of passage as confirmation for many young people. The Friday after Thanksgiving — Black Friday — is consumerism's most holy of days, calling people out of their homes and into places of worship where offerings go not into plates but into cash registers. Most of us can sing television commercial jingles as easily as we can sing the lines of old hymns.

[4] In a cultural milieu that preaches economic prosperity as the sole vision of the good life, the church has both an opportunity and a responsibility to lift up counter-cultural models of life and witness. The Lutheran theological tradition, and the ELCA as an expression of Christ's church, is rich with resources to help us create such counter-cultural space. One of those resources is the ELCA's Young Adults in Global Mission (YAGM) program. (Those "in the know" pronounce fondly, if a bit awkwardly, "YAGM" as one full word.)

[5] I'm certain I'm not alone among clergy and lay rostered colleagues in saying this, but I'm convinced that I have the best call in the entire church. As Program Director for YAGM, I have the deep and humbling privilege of accompanying some 50 young adults each year as they engage in a transformative, year-long journey in international service. These young people, all between the ages of 19 and 29, serve alongside companion church bodies and organizations in one of ten countries around the world. They serve in a variety of areas, from congregational ministry to human rights work, from alternative education to health and development projects. The YAGM program is structured in such a way as to provide support for each volunteer. At the same time, it provides a challenging level of independence that impels volunteers to wrestle profoundly with questions of faith, justice, sense of self, and sense of call.

[6] The YAGM experience runs deeply counter to the U.S. consumer culture. It forms and transforms participants in remarkable ways that can only be attributed to the work of the Holy Spirit. Of course, many YAGM volunteers have already been shaped counter-culturally through experiences with other ministries of the ELCA. Liberal arts education in the Lutheran tradition taught many YAGM to think critically about life and the world. Service at Lutheran outdoor ministry sites has acquainted many with a lifestyle of simplicity and the gifts of intentional Christian community. Many are members of congregations, or have been part of Lutheran campus ministries at public universities, where the preaching and teaching focus on service and social justice. Not all YAGM volunteers share this formation profile. Nonetheless, these are the kinds of experiences that appear to open particular young adults to the challenge of living and serving abroad for a full year.

[7] Many components of the YAGM program contribute to the counter-cultural formation of our young adult volunteers. Some of those components seem simply to be the work of the Holy Spirit and are difficult to capture fully in words. Some themes, however, saturate the experiences of nearly all of the young people who serve in the YAGM program. These themes form a base by which our volunteers develop a deeper capacity to look askance at consumerism in the United States context. Among these themes, the following are central: learning how to live with less, discovering the gift of relying on others, and understanding relationship as core to our call as people of faith.

How to Live with Less
[8] YAGM volunteers are supported financially throughout their year of service. They receive full room and board, travel to and from their country of service, and health insurance. They also receive a small monthly stipend meant to help them live at a level similar to the community among whom they're serving. That stipend is typically less than $5 per day.

[9] For many, it's the first time they've come face-to-face with literally not having the cash (or the plastic) to do or buy everything they'd like. Almost every YAGM volunteer struggles at some point with the perceived lack of freedom that comes with having reduced financial resources. Amy, who served as a YAGM volunteer in Mexico, shared this in one of her newsletters:

"I knew my monthly stipend of 1200 pesos [about $90 US] would not last if I wasn't careful…Realizing the month of October has 31 days and 5 Saturdays, I was really feeling the money crunch. My host family's clothes washer was broken for 3 weeks and instead of paying for laundry services I decided to wash my essentials by hand (which is terribly time consuming) like my host family. The realization 'I really don't have the money to [get my clothes washed]' was a startling one. Applying that to families all over the world that have to make bigger decisions than whether or not to wash clothes by hand was a lot to take in. Everyone 'knows' there is need in the world, but experiencing it firsthand really deepens the understanding."

[10] Yet living on a stipend is an exercise in voluntary poverty. Like Amy, over the course of the year most YAGM become increasingly aware that, while they "feel" poor, they have the wild privilege of escaping that "poverty" whenever they like. At the same time, our volunteers witness daily the ways in which such escape is impossible for most people in their communities of service. One YAGM volunteer leaves her comfortable flat in Slovakia, where she is serving among Roma ("Gypsy") people, only to witness a woman and her children digging through the Dumpster across the street in search of food and items they might resell. Another grieves with a South African family who has lost a child to AIDS, principally because they did not have bus fare to get to the clinic where free antiretroviral drugs were regularly administered. A third volunteer, who grew up on meat and potatoes, tries with all her might to develop a "taste" for the Malaysian rice-based diet. She seeks to be grateful for any kind of food as she serves her kindergarten student what she knows will be his only meal of the day. For a moment, at least, the YAGM stipend which once looked meager feels terribly extravagant. Those moments begin to multiply as the year goes on.

[11] It is important to state that pity is not generally a feeling that most of our YAGM connect to the witness of poverty in their friends' lives. Far more often, I hear our volunteers reflect with humility on the tremendous strength of spirit they experience in the people among whom they serve. Even in the midst of dehumanizing situations of poverty, our volunteers discover in their global companions a confounding ability to live with joy. Such joy is wholly unconnected to "stuff." Rather, it is lived in simple things like spending unhurried time with family, praying with neighbors, or sharing tea with a new friend. These kinds of experiences are often co-opted for our volunteers by the U.S. consumer culture. Time with family and friends is rarely unhurried. Rather, it needs be scheduled into an already too-busy day planner, and is almost always buffered by the fancy coffee shop, the big screen television, or the new video game which so often become the bases of our relationships. Being required to live with less frees our volunteers from consumerism's demands that they accumulate more and more. Instead of finding "joy" in a latte they can't afford, voluntary poverty allows our volunteers to reflect on what truly brings them joy. It allows them to rediscover life in all fullness, which God desires for each of us.

[12] The voluntary poverty that YAGM volunteers experiences also opens for them new ways of living in solidarity with God's people. They learn from their communities how to live with simple joy. They also learn to move far beyond the maxim I often hear from people who have short-term experiences in communities of economic need — "they are so poor, but so happy." The strength of spirit that our volunteers witness in their host communities is borne of deep necessity. There is nothing "happy" about not being able to provide for one's family, nothing "happy" about burying a child because they had no access to medicine, nothing "happy" about a malnourished kindergartner. The life in all fullness which God so desires is found, in part, in the simple joys that host communities model for our volunteers. It also requires, however, an economic structure in which all people can live not just with simple joy, but with dignity. Our volunteers' voluntary rejection of wealth is also a rejection of the economic powers that steal a dignified life from so many of God's people. By learning to live at an economic level similar to that of their host communities, our volunteers are living the conviction that all of God's people deserve access to a dignified life where their basic needs are met.

How to Rely on Others
[13] YAGM volunteers are drawn to the program because they want to be of service to others. Jesus' commands in Matthew 25 are compelling. Like all of us, our volunteers are called to feed the hungry, give drink to the thirsty, welcome the stranger, clothe the naked, visit the prisoner, care for the sick.

[14] Coming from a monetarily wealthy culture, our volunteers — along with almost every U.S. American Christian I know — are accustomed to thinking of "the other" when considering who is hungry and needs food, who is a stranger and needs inviting, who is sick and needs care. How shocking, then, to quite suddenly encounter a complete paradigmatic role reversal of the call in Matthew 25.

[15] Imagine being plopped down in the middle of a country into which you have never set foot. If you speak anything of the local language you likely don't speak it well. If you know anyone else in the country, it is likely only through one e-mail exchange. You don't know how to use the bus system, don't understand how the money works, don't know how to navigate the local market, don't know the appropriate ways to greet people, and cannot blend in no matter how hard you try. Such is the life of a YAGM volunteer.

[16] YAGM volunteers do, without question, provide tremendous service to their host communities throughout the year. But especially at first, our volunteers can't function well enough to be of much help to anyone. They are the hungry, the homeless, the stranger, the needy. They find themselves, for the first time in their young adult lives, having to rely fully on the genuine hospitality and care of strangers. Discovering that they literally can't make it on their own, and must learn to accept the gifts of their hosts, who typically have so much less in material resources, is both humbling and worldview-altering.

[17] The United States consumer culture teaches us implicitly to value people, at least in part, based on what they own. Even as early as elementary school, the kids who rise to the top of the "cool" crowd are the ones whose families have money. They're the kids who come to school dressed in the trendiest fashions, or who bring of-the-moment toys for show-and-tell. As adults, we are pressured to keep up with the proverbial Joneses in various and sundry ways. Whether it's the house or the car or the clothes or the electronics, we compare ourselves to others, often without even realizing it. The message comes at us, overtly and covertly, from all kinds of directions — you are what you own. There's a sense of personal and social security in having lots of stuff. Our "stuff" helps us feel confident that we can take care of ourselves, and it shows others that we are successful people.

[18] Except when it doesn't. YAGM volunteers board airplanes for their countries of service carrying just two pieces of luggage and a carryon. Many live with families who don't own much more than that collectively. Yet in these families our YAGM volunteers discover a deep and radical hospitality, the likes of which they've never had need to experience before. They are welcomed in and cared for unconditionally, as Christ welcomes and cares for us. It is a simple gift of grace, and it's one they can't live without in this new context. Unable to rely any longer on the security of their "stuff," our volunteers recognize that this sense of security was false to begin with.

[19] In learning to accept the gifts of their hosts, our volunteers also learn the value of shared power within the Body of Christ. In order for a gift to be honored and appreciated, that gift must have a receiver. Accepting the immense gift of radical hospitality is often very difficult for our volunteers. They know the economic realities present in most of their host communities, and they are accustomed to not wanting to put people out. Yet as they learn to accept the material and spiritual gifts of their hosts, they are swept up into a new vision of what it means to be members together of one body, where all have needs and all have gifts to share. They learn to supplant the false security of material goods with the deeper power of Christ-like hospitality.

Relationship Is Humanity's Telos
[20] Reading YAGM applications reveals some fascinating things about the dominant cultural context of the United States. Young adult resumes include long lists of achievement awards, impressive grade point averages, prestigious leadership roles, and challenging internship experiences. Independence and self-reliance are often cited in essays as standout personality characteristics. When asked about personal strengths and weaknesses, nearly every potential weakness is couched in positive language. In short, our applicants do their best to sell themselves. And who could blame them? The very language of "selling" oneself is telling. Our very selves are commodities to be sold. Ours is a culture built on the values of achievement, competition, and progress. These goal-oriented values permeate nearly every aspect of our lives. There are noble things to be found in these values, to be sure. There is also a danger, however. In my experience, these consumer values lead us to believe that our primary worth and purpose as human beings lies in the things that we do.

[21] When entering into the YAGM experience, much of the things by which our volunteers have been accustomed to defining themselves are stripped away. Nobody knows the school from which they graduated and frankly, nobody cares. Their GPAs are immaterial. The prestigious choirs and sports teams and honor societies mean nothing. For most YAGM, this is downright terrifying. Of course, it can also be liberating. Just like one's achievements don't matter, neither do one's failings. Dropped out of school? It's a non-issue. Made poor personal decisions in the past? Nobody knows. In short, the cultural trappings that define our YAGM volunteers in the United States are simply rendered irrelevant in their new contexts. As they live into the year, it becomes abundantly clear that the only thing that really matters is one's ability to create authentic, meaningful relationships with people from whom the volunteer is very different.

[22] Christian ethicist Rebecca Todd Peters says this about the industrialized world: "What is sorely needed in the industrialized world is a recovery of the moral conviction that human beings are fundamentally social creatures, and an important aspect of the good life is the recognition that the social well-being of people arises from participation in community…" (from her book In Search of the Good Life). In many ways, the first months that our YAGM volunteers spend in service are akin to entering a recovery program. It's a recovery from the capital-minded, goal-oriented, fast-paced world in which they were socialized. They don't earn enough money to consider shopping as a form of "therapy." They typically don't have the resources to be connected to the internet 24/7. For those who do have television, watching it in another language, or based out of another cultural framework, often feels too much like work for it to be a mindless escape. They rest more. They read more. They pray more. I recognize that such a lifestyle may sound like a dream for many who read this article. Yet I can assure you that such sudden separation from all that one formerly used to define or care for oneself is extremely unsettling.

[23] It's also a supreme gift. When all the cultural trappings are stripped away, our volunteers are freed to understand themselves anew. They aren't the Honors Student or the Dropout or the Athlete or the Screw-up. They simply are. The oily cross is again traced onto the fabric of their lives — "Child of God, you have been sealed by the Holy Spirit and marked with the cross of Christ forever." That is enough. The pressures of a consumer society, which seek to commoditize our very beings, are washed away in the return to our baptismal identity. The good life, our YAGM volunteers begin to recognize, is not about how much stuff we can accumulate, nor about how accomplished we are. Rather, it's about living into our primary identities as children of God, called into relationship with one another and with the world. The work they do is very significant to the lives of their host communities, but a YAGM volunteer's first and most important "job" is to simply be present with people. They are called to bear witness to the movement of God's spirit in the lives of the communities among whom they are serving, and to allow themselves to be shaped by what they witness there. They discover that their "good works" aren't worth much if they are not first rooted in relationship. Such a discovery, to many of our young people, feels a whole lot like salvation.

[24] Learning to understand humanity's purpose as something that we are rather than something that we do is perhaps the biggest challenge inherent to accepting the call to serve as a YAGM volunteer. But it's also tremendously transformative, and not just for our volunteers. We are not "social creatures," as Peters names us, simply for the sake of being social. We are "social creatures" — called into relationship — for the sake a world in need. It is impossible to live and work for a new spiritual, economic, and social order without being rooted in community. It is from the base of relationship, rooted in Christ and reaching out to one another, that we are able to exercise moral agency, able to create new ways of being in the world, able to support one another through the ups and downs of struggling for justice in a world seemingly stacked against the poor.

Coming "Home"
[25] I often tell our volunteers that, as profound as their experiences abroad have been, their most significant work as missionaries won't begin until they return home to the United States. Coming home is hard. In fact, most of our YAGM struggle mightily to reconnect with the United States as "home" after a year away. Their host communities around the world shape and transform our volunteers in such a way that makes returning to the U.S. consumer cultural milieu feel like an intensely foreign experience. Thankfully, they have one another to rely on as they navigate the transition. It takes time, but as they slowly resettle into life here in the United States, our volunteers begin to recognize the major internal shifts that came as a result of their YAGM experience.

[26] About thirty percent of our YAGM volunteers end up in seminary following their journey in international service. Others attend graduate school for social work, medicine, international development, or environmental science. Still others commit themselves to another year of volunteering in the domestic sphere, or accept jobs with organizations like Bread for the World or ELCA World Hunger. Some enter into a period of discernment, crashing with Mom and Dad and serving for a time as coffee shop baristas. In all of these experiences, the lives of our returned volunteers become vivid reflections of the global host communities that shaped them. I am continually grateful for their witness in the world, and for the ways they will challenge this church — and all of us together — to live with joy and intention.